A read-only archive of discourse.darkjedibrotherhood.com as of Sunday May 01, 2022.

[Code: Dread] Epic Rap Battles of the DJB: Gaius Julius Caesar vs. Seabr’imsto’nedansr aka Brimstone


Seabr’imsto’nedansr aka Brimstone: Team Fancy Hat
Gaius Julius Caesar: Team Half-Cyborg


  1. 2 posts minimum per rapper.
  2. 8-32 lines per post (rap verses), with an alternating rhyme scheme (inner rhyming in lines can also be added).
  3. The rap must target the “weaknesses” of the opposing rapper, as well as elevate the “strengths” of the posting rapper.
  4. Rapping must be PG-13 appropriate and Star Wars-appropriate. Hitting below the belt may happen, but don’t hit too hard.

Posts MAY NOT be edited after the next person posts. This way, lines cannot be added or removed to throw off the other person’s writing. Editing posts after your partner posts will result in disqualification.

Grading will be based on originality of the “disses,” accuracy to the characters, creativity of the rhyme scheme, and humor. Bonus points will be added if your partner and you provide a royalty-free beat that you followed in your writing for the judges to listen to.

Ghetto Beat







Here we go, tha epic battle of Diss
A raggedy oldschool Human against tha blue-skinned Chiss
Yo ass have tha rank, tha seniority
But afta dis battle, you be beggin fo’ pity

This quest of yours, yo’ throat is parch
You’ll be beggin it ta end by tha Ides of March
Da Force aint phat up in you, up in fact it is lacking
Just like yo’ command of respect is slacking

Yo ass been round before tha fall of tha Republic
But you did not a god damn thang without turnin yo’ stomach
Just as you jacked yo’ hyped last name
Yo crazy-ass game up in rappin is cappin’ yo’ game

So come afta me, wit all of yo’ wits
By tha time yo’ dome works, yo’ Dependz fills wit shitz
Waitin on dis upcomin part-timer
You’ve forgotten every last muthafuckin thang from yo’ Alzheimer