A read-only archive of discourse.darkjedibrotherhood.com as of Sunday May 01, 2022.

[June Pilot] Contract 008: Sight - Assassination, B-Class


ACB Contract Offices
Lower Levels, Arcona Citadel
Estle City, Selen

The Onderonian had just lit up a cigarette when a slightly familiar man walked through the doorway, taking a seat at the silent gesture. Celevon rose from his seat and walked to the door, peering out and glaring back and forth suspiciously. After discovering an empty hall, he returned to his seat.

“There a problem?”

“Beyond a clearly invisible line of people outside of my door, no,” the Prelate muttered, taking a drag off of his cigarette. “Since I’m certain you’re not here to indulge my paranoia, let’s get to it.”

The Nighthawk member snatched the holodisk from the air, having grown accustomed to things getting flung at him aboard the ship. As the information appeared, the Krath’s red eyes trailed down it, unaware that he was mouthing the words as he read:

Mission: Assassination, B-Class
Target: Dreyna Olens, Male Humanoid, aged 30 years
Specifics: Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to kill this man by whatever means you so choose so long as it doesn’t lead back to us. Whilst he may be an Information Broker, do not let his appearance fool you. The man is well-versed in several styles of martial arts, with trophies to speak of his accomplishments.
Suspected Resistance: Medium. Though by no means harmless himself, Olens has a constant patrol of two bodyguards that switches roughly every six hours.

“Any further information?”

“Only that Dreyna Olens has already passed on information to One Sith forces. We want this man dead as soon as possible. You may either leave the bodyguards living or eliminate them as well. Report to me when Olens lies dead.”


ACB Contract Offices
Lower Levels, Arcona Citadel
Estle City, Selen

Shutting off the holodisk, a smile crept across Sight’s face at the Onderonian’s words. Rising to his feet the Krath looked down at the Obelisk.

“Very well,” the DIA member spoke before turning to leave. Pausing at the door, he looked back over his shoulder at the man behind the desk. “You really need to get some help for that paranoia, just because we are watching you does not mean you are on the elimination list.” Sight’s grin widened as Celevon’s eye began to twitch.

Disappearing into the hallway before the Prelate had a chance to respond to his words, the Krath walked quickly as he committed the assignment to memory.

Library Reference Section
Upper Levels, Arcona Citadel
Estle City, Selen

Several hours later Sight was furiously tapping away on his datapad as he navigated through a few system back doors. It wasn’t long before the Krath found the information he was searching for, his brow furrowed as he read the text.

“He must know we are on to him.” The Albino muttered under his breath as he looked at the coordinates on the screen, committing them to memory before disconnecting the datapad. Sliding a few credits across the desk to the attendant, Sight made his way out of the library.

As the Krath walked through the hallways, he began making a mental checklist of extra gear he would need for the operation. Sight sighed as he realized most of it was still on the AGV Nighthawk, including the raw explosives.

“Captian this is Nortorshin, I’m coming back on board. I have orders and need to fetch a few items.” The Albino spoke into his commlink slowly and quietly as he walked down the hallway.

“Very well Chief, are you planning on stopping by the bridge before you head out?” Captain Cortel’s voice responded in turn. Sight knew she was really asking what his assignment was.

“Thats a negative Captain, and before you ask outright, they are of the classified nature.” He chuckled to himself as he flicked the power on the device to the off position before Arcia had the chance to respond.

AGV Nighthawk
Deck 5
Low orbital dock

The Deck chief nodded to the Krath as he strode across the AGV Nighthawk’s hangar bay. Sight returned the nod to the larger man. Over the course of his time on the ship, Sight had grown fond of having conversations with the Deck Chief. Stopping beside the man on his way to the armory, Sight eyed one of the shuttles in the bay.

“I need that shuttle for a few days Chief, have some business to attend to off world.” His voice was low as he palmed some credits and a pack of smokes to the man.

“Chief Nortorshin, always a pleasure.” The Deck Chief smiled as he took the bribe contained in the hand shake. “I’ll personally see to it that she is fueled and ready to go.” The two exchanged a nod and parted ways again.

Sight rang the bell at the armory window and waited for Quartermaster Skar to appear. His head tilted to the side a bit when the young Kaleesh appeared in the window.

“Chief Nortorshin, back from shore leave already?” The Quartermaster asked his tone one of curiosity.

“Only temporarily, need to get some of my special tools first.” The albinos voice remained level as he finally realized what was different about the Quartermaster. “Is that a new mask Rrogon?”

The Kaleesh swallowed on a dry throat before disappearing within the armory only to pop open a door to the side of the window.

“Come in Sight, I know how you don’t want anyone touching your special tools.” His voice remained level but there seemed to be something other than work going on in his mind. The Krath decided to integrate the boy after he returned.

In the back of the armory, Sight and Rrogon spread several large crates across the floor. Carefully the Albino picked out various detonators, ignition devices, explosive compounds, and wiring. When he was satisfied that he had everything he would need to craft the devices he would use, they closed the cases before returning them to the shelves. Quartermaster Skar produced a large rucksack and stood back as the Krath packed his tools into it. Before leaving Sight added several optics and various other items he would need. After he was done in the armory, Sight made a trip up to his quarters to change into a set of nondescript grey robes and cloak. Making his way back across the flight deck with his gear, Sight nodded to the Deck Chief who gave him a thumbs up.


Pons Ora
Abafar, Outer Rim

“Why do they always run to the desert?” The Krath muttered to himself as he sat on the floor in the two story abandoned desert hovel. He had been watching Dreyna Olens and his body guards for two days. He had determined that Dreyna and one body guard would leave the building across the street every morning and return around mid day. They would spend several hours inside before all three of them would leave and return as the sun was setting.

However they were not the only ones inhabiting the building, which seemed to house two families and their young children. Which made sense, considering it was an apartment building. Sight would follow the three men from a distance when they left their berthing, using minimal assistance from the force to blend into the crowded streets.

The information broker and his cronies followed a predictable pattern, most of their time spent in a cantina, and always around a crowd. The Krath hadn’t noticed any information being bought or sold by Dreyna. Which was odd for an information broker, and led Sight to believe the man had caught wind of his impending doom.

It was during the night that the Albino stayed up well after his targets would have gone to sleep. He was crafting remote detonating explosives from the most common parts he had on hand. The Krath also was using the most common designs he could think of, in order to hide his involvement in creating the devices. Sight cringed a little each time he finished one of the devices as he wished that he could use his own designs, but the Krath knew he had to hide the involvement of Clan Arcona and by extension himself in this matter.

Two more days passed in the same manner until his toys were ready to be used. During the morning of that day the Albino packed his belongings away and staged them by the door to the abandoned building. It was in the late afternoon that Sight slipped into his targets apartment building and began to hide the explosives against the critical structural support areas. He exited the building as the sun was starting to kiss the horizon. Quickly, the Krath made his way across the street to hide in the shadows of the abandoned building he had been living in. It wasn’t long before the drunk Dreyna and his large body guards came staggering down the empty street.

“Look at that boys, another flacking hobo.” The information broker stammered out in disgust at the Krath who in that moment, huddled against an abandoned building, looked like one of the many homeless that littered this desert town.

“Hey boss, let’s go in before we get in trouble again.” His first bodyguard suggested trying to turn Olens towards the apartments. Shrugging off his sober guard the information broker staggered towards Sight issuing an incoherent spew of curses.

“Brother, don’t do this again, we can’t afford another run in with the local authorities.” The older bodyguard voiced the pair’s concern. Both men moved forward to prevent Olsen from approaching the homeless man. But their attempt was to no avail, as Dreyna spun around to shove both back.

“You may be my elder brothers, but I’m the one in charge here and I will do as I please!” The information brooker chastised his family.

“We don’t have to take your drunken ramblings little brother, do what you will.” The first bodyguard spoke before walking into the apartment building.

“Are you going to leave me too brother?”

“I should go help him pack, we will have to find a new place to hide after this.” The elder Olsen’s words carried disappointment within them as he followed their other sibling inside. Dreyna turned towards the homeless man staggering towards him once more.

“Listen here you worthle-” Olsen started, but found himself unable to finish his insult as Sights Vibrodagger slid underneath the drunken man’s jaw and upwards, effectively forcing the man’s jaw shut.

“Finally,” Sight exclaimed softly as he rose slowly, keeping the drunk man on the short leash.

“You know, you never seem to stop spewing the most uninformed and idiotic things. Which is a surprise, considering your profession.” Sight spoke softly, spinning the information broker around so he was facing the apartment building with the Albino holding him by the blade in his head. Reaching out towards the apartments, Dreyna started to struggle to free himself as his drunken brain finally understood the dire circumstance he was in.

“Oh, we will have none of that now.” The blood thirsty Krath said softly into Olsen’s ear as he twisted the knife slightly and applied more upwards pressure, causing the man to groan in agony. “I’ve watched you for too long now to let you or your little henchmen go. My blood lust demands that you all die, unfortunately I won’t be giving you the grand exit that I had planned, but you can watch as I let those two dimwits take the spotlight all to themselves.” As he spoke Sight brought forth the activation button for the remote explosives.

“Small explosives on the structural weak spots, and a nice little shrapnel producing fire bomb in all the apartments.” Dreyna attempted to free himself once more as the Krath spoke, only to find a renewed pain in his mouth and a grip like iron around his body. “Now it would be a shame for you to hasten you own exit before the fireworks went off.” Sight said, his words full of anticipation and murderous desire.

“Ah, there’s the signal.” Sight’s voice smooth as velvet as he whispered into Olsen’s ear. “Your lights on, they must have just started packing.” Eyes wide, Dreyna watched as Sight’s pale fingers de-pressed the button and the windows in the apartment building shattered outwards fireballs chasing the glass.

Moments later, a series of small blasts sounded from within the building, causing structural failure. Dreyna surged forward his thoughts on his older brothers as Sight’s vibrodagger slipped out from his skull pulling quickly across the mans carotid artery. The Krath exhaled in ecstasy as the arterial spray spewed forth from his victim’s neck. However, the feeling was short lived as he reached into the abandoned building and grabbed his rucksack.

“I wish I could stay longer, but I need to become a ghost before the authorities arrive. You understand don’t you?” The Krath’s words falling only upon the ears of the freshly dead.


ACB Contract Offices
Lower Levels, Arcona Citadel
Estle City, Selen

Celevon sat behind his desk, taking a final draw from his cigarette. His eyes scanned over several new security monitors. Taking relief in the absence of life from the screens, the Prelate exhaled the smoke as he set his feet upon the desk’s surface and reached for another from the pack. He jumped as there was a flash of movement just within the threshold of his doorway.

“I see you have reached a new level of paranoia since I was last here.” The DIA agent spoke as he took a seat his hand flicking outwards a holodisk flipping onto the Obelisk’s desk.

“I take it your assignment went well then.” Celevon spoke his eyes fixing upon the Albino.

“It did, my after action report is contained within, it is the only copy.” Sight’s voice was even with no trace of emotion as he spoke.

“Very well,” The Prelate looked down at his desk as he retrieved the holodisk. “You know…” His voice trailed off as he looked back up to find himself alone.

AGV Nighthawk
Deck 4
Low orbital dock

Sight leaned against the walls of the turbolift as it came to rest on deck 4, which housed his department. Shore leave had ended and he was anxious to hear the stories of his crew’s time off ship. However, this was not to be. The Krath’s blood pressure started to rise when the doors whisked open. Before him was his once pristine Engineering department torn apart and strewn across the floor. Captain Cortel stood in the middle of the mess, Sight’s engineers cowering against the walls.

“Chief Nortorshin, so happy you could find the time to join us, with your busy schedule and lack of radio contact.” The Captain’s voice was sarcastic. Taking one last look around, she nodded and waved for the engineers to follow her.

“Never turn you communicator off on me again, Chief. Now clean up this mess.” Her tone was stern as she spoke to the Albino while brushing past him. Sight turned around to watch as his crew boarded the lift with the Captain. After the doors had sealed, the Krath started the clean up, his mood severely dampened.

End of contract


Grade: Satisfactory - 2 Points

Despite the fact that I loved the story and your use of character personality traits, there were a few errors that demonstrate your lack of command of the English language. These errors are the only thing that kept your contract from receiving the grade of Excellent.

An example of this lies in the fourth paragraph of your first post with small grammatical errors.

Several hours later Sight was furiously tapping away on his datapad as he navigated through a few system back doors. It wasn’t long before the Krath found the information he was searching for, his brow furrowed as he read the text.

There is a comma missing after ‘Several hours later’. This is due to the fact that the reader should have a timely pause, which indicates a comma and the lack of it interrupts the flow of your story. The next grammatical error lies in the following paragraph:

“He must know we are on to him.” The Albino muttered under his breath as he looked at the coordinates on the screen, committing them to memory before disconnecting the datapad.

Your error in this case lies with the fact that the second sentence is an immediate follow-up thought to the previous. It looks like it should be a part of the same sentence. You can correct this error in the future by replacing the period with a comma, connecting the dialogue to the next sentence.

The only other error I saw worth mention is that you didn’t capitalise ‘Force’ when referring to the mystical energy we use as characters. Otherwise, I loved the amount of detail and realism you put forth.

All said, due to several grammatical and spelling errors, you receive a grade of Satisfactory. Very well done. I look forward to seeing you take another contract.

~ Cel2