Kylex’s Knight Fiction
By Blade Ta’var
Kylex stood in the middle of his Quaestor’s office, panting as he grabbed his side. Beads of sweat rolled down his face as he fought to keep himself upright. It had been a grueling 2 days of “tests”, each of which got progressively harder. The lightsaber fights, the obstacle courses, and the Force battles. Blade didn’t give him much time to recuperate between them and often interrupted his sleep at random times of the night. The Hunter found himself wondering just how much it would take to pass his trials.
“Wha-What’s left?” he asked with an annoyed edge.
The Zeltron smiled mischievously.
“One last job. Just for you.” Blade opened a drawer and pulled out a printed picture, pushing it across the desk. Kylex raised a brow in curiosity and grabbed the photo. It was picture of Archangel Palpatine in the cafeteria eating his favorite type of cupcake. It delicately laid on the center of a white plate.
“Wait a minute. I am not taking Archangel on. He’ll kill me!” The Hunter waved his hands in protest.
“Did I say you were going to fight him?”
“But the picture…”
“Has a cupcake in it. I want Archangel’s cupcake on my desk. Intact. This is your last challenge. Now it’s true you can’t fight him head on, but there are so many other options available to you. Take as long as you need but this last trial won’t end until you either get me the cupcake or fail. I suggest you don’t fail.”
“Are you serious?” Kylex asked, wondering if she had gone crazy.
“Oh yes. You are dismissed. Do not return until you have it. Go.”
The Hunter left her office a bit unsure of the situation but a grin was already forming on his tired face.
She may be trying to kill me but this should be fun.
3 Days Later
Kylex sat in the crowded cafeteria, waiting for the right moment to strike. He had watched Archangel Palpatine carefully over the last few days and finally felt confident enough to stage his little distraction. He knew when the lunch room would be the most packed. He also knew when the Warlord liked to gorge himself on a mountain of food, which was often followed by a delicious looking, pink frosted cupcake he hadn’t seen often in the cafeteria so far. The Hunter wondered if equites got a special menu.
Here he is…
Archangel set his heavily laden tray on the table right next to Kylex, put his cupcake to the side, and dug in. It was time, thought Kylex. He gave his unseen paid assistant a simple everyday hand signal and waited.
Three. Two. One.
A row of flash mines went off harmlessly several rows away, slightly blinding both Palatinaeans but otherwise causing no direct damage. That wasn’t the point though. The cafeteria broke into a temporary panic as those closest to the splash zone wandered blindly into people further away, who ran into other people as they tried to dodge their blind assailants. This chain reaction didn’t worry the Warlord, who was more boulder than man, but the mass of bodies everywhere was just what Kylex needed.
While the pandemonium ensued the Hunter had milled around the vicinity of the cupcake, but once it hit critical mass he quickly rushed forward. He jabbed a hand forward into the open gap between the mob as they pestered Archangel, swiped the cupcake, and took off in a crouch as he put it safely away in a metal lunchbox. Using the cafeteria mob as a cover, he felt the first stirrings of a beast best not angered.
“WHO TOOK MY CUPCAKE!” The Warlord thundered to the assembled crowd, who promptly shrank away from him.
No one answered. Kylex continued to edge his way to the exit as he felt Archangel probe the vicinity for the obvious suspects. The Hunter had almost made it to the doors, the rest of the hall standing still, before the Warlord caught onto him.
“YOU SNEAKY LITTLE BASTARD. GET BACK HERE!”
Kylex chanced a look over his shoulder, watching Archangel start to run towards him through a sea of people. The Hunter gave the Warlord a cheeky grin and ran back to Blade’s office as fast as he could, using the Force to help propel him forward. He felt a malevolent pressure on the back of his mind as he ran away. He didn’t bother to look back, ignored the angry yells and crashes in the distance, and sprinted until he reached the outside of Blade’s office. Yanking the door open, he rushed inside to find his Quaestor smiling.
“I take it you have it. Take that with you and let’s go. I have a shuttle waiting.”
Kylex did his best to keep up with her, following closely on her heel. He could still feel the pure anger coming from the Warlord, but laughed despite it as he ran up the boarding ramp of the shuttle. He turned around as it started to raise and couldn’t resist laughing back.
Blade smirked and nodded to the droid pilot. “Let’s go.”
Unfortunately, the ship didn’t take off as she expected. The Warrior felt a rather vicious tug in the Force and reached out to it, pushing back at its source with the Force. Her hands thrust forward as she tried to push the angry man away from the ship. He didn’t budge, but it did loosen his hold on the ship. The droid pilot set the throttle to max, finally zooming away from the Warlord about to have a tantrum. Blade merely laughed and looked at Kylex, who looked like he was deciding whether or not he wanted to freak out.
“He is going to kill me. Isn’t he?”
“Take it easy, Kylex. Archangel will forgive you. Someday.”
Several Hours Later
City of Ohmen
Kylex walked silently behind the Zeltron, following his Quaestor’s lead through the many corridors of the Imperial Palace. He wondered what was going on and had asked several times, but Blade didn’t say anything besides ‘keep the cupcake safe’. He was starting to get annoyed, but on the bright side Ohmen was significantly warmer than their ice cube of a planet. He wondered if Archangel would be waiting for him when he returned, but tried not to think about it, assuming Blade would help smooth things over. The Zeltron abruptly stopped before a long hall with a throne at the end.
“We’re here. Give me the cupcake,” she demanded.
The Hunter handed it over and watched in amazement as his boss took out a holo-recorder and proceeded to record herself eating the cupcake in front of the throne room hall. He shook his head as she winked at the recorder before turning it off.
“Did I go through all that trouble just so you can take a holo-recording of yourself eating his favorite cupcake?” Kylex bristled with annoyance.
“No. You got a cupcake so I could pull a prank on the old man. It was a marvelous last test, no?”
The Hunter merely grumbled but couldn’t help but grudgingly smile when he imagined Archangel’s reaction later on.
“You better tell me how he reacts to it. I assume you won’t let him kill me.”
“Don’t worry. Soon enough you will have a weapon of your own to protect yourself. Now, let’s go inside,” she said as she wiped crumbs off her hands.
The pair walked down the hallway towards a man sitting on a throne. Several figures stood to the side of it. They were but a few meters away before his Quaestor told him to kneel. He looked upwards into the eyes staring down at him, watching Blade join them at the side of the Throne. Xen’mordin stared him down.
“Blade tells me all about you, Kylex. She says you are ready. Are you?” the baritone voice asked.
“Yes,” said the Hunter with a nervous edge. He jealously eyed a lightsaber resting on the throne’s armrest. He so wanted one for himself.
The Emperor and his Quaestor approached him, the former with his lightsaber lit. Kylex froze, unsure of what they wanted him to do.
“Kylex, you have proven your worth time and again. Your dedication to the Clan and your excellent performance in your Knight Trials is commendable. I hereby give you the rank of Knight.” Xen carefully raised and lowered the red bladed lightsaber to either side of Kylex’s head.
Turning off the saber, he nodded towards Blade.
“Take this lightsaber as your own and use it to strike down our enemies,” said Blade as took a spare saber off her belt and used the Force to rest it within Kylex’s eager hands.
A broad grin spread across Kylex’s face as he looked up at them. The rest of the people in the hall formed a circle around him, each holding a bucket.
“Rise Knight!” Xen’s voice reverberated off the empty halls.
Kylex stood up gleefully, only to be immediately inundated by alcohol as everyone poured the buckets over his head. He didn’t care though. He was finally a Knight. The galaxy better watch out.